Dear God, Why'd You Send Me to a Host Club?
by StarrburstNoodles
Summary: Yuki Miyagi was only trying to escape from her troubles, but the Ouran High School Host Club has other ideas...
1. Chapter 1: In the Beginning

"Stop! Thief!"

I rolled my eyes.

_Yeah, like I'm really going to listen to you, dumbass._

_Why do you want this bread, anyway?_

_You can always go and buy some more!_

_Damn rich bastard._

I was running away from this guy, for the sake of a full stomach.

You see, I broke into this guy's house to get some food.

And he came downstairs, looking to eat a midnight snack...

... And found me.

So, here we are.

Then there's the fact that I don't want to go to jail just for stealing a loaf of bread.

And trust me, if this guy catches me, he **will** involve the police.

And I'm _not_ going to jail just because I'm hungry.

No, if I'm going to prison, it'll be for something serious.

Like murder, or something.

Anyway.

"When I catch you, the only place you'll be running to is **jail**!"

See? What'd I tell ya?

I cursed him under my breath.

But, soon I didn't have to worry about him, because I left him to eat my dust.

You see, I've had lots of practice at running away from situations, and he's just a fat old man.

The odds were against him from the start.

My legs were getting weak from having no energy to work with in the beginning, so I plopped down immediately in a plaza full of people.

They didn't notice me, anyway, so it didn't matter where I sat.

I quickly sent up a prayer to God, thanking him for the food and not letting me go to jail.

And, I know what you're thinking.

You're thinking that I'm such a hypocrite, right?

I mean, I just **stole** from someone!

My response is:

Hey! I'm poor and hungry, all right! Give me a break here!

Just because I don't have enough money to buy my own food doesn't make me a bad person!

And I could've robbed them blind!

But I _didn't_.

I only got what I needed, and took off.

I probably would've gotten some clothes, too, had he not busted me.

And I need some clothes.

Desperately.

I was on my second piece when I saw a free clothes opportunity.

A girl about my age (which reminds me, I'm fifteen, just so you know) walked out of a store with her arms full of bags of clothes. She set them onto a bench, and walked in to another store...

... Leaving them unattended.

I smiled.

_Free clothes!_

I looked around; making sure no one was looking, I swiped two bags.

This went unnoticed.

_Brilliant!_

I jogged into an alleyway and switched out of my older, dirtier clothes and into a new outfit.

It fit me perfectly. And I was only able to see this thanks to a soft, blue light coming from behind me...

_Wait, __**what**__?_ _This is a deserted alley!_

I turned around, and saw a blue, shimmering wall. I walked towards it slowly, deliberating each step, until I was at a close enough distance to reach out and touch it.

Nothing happened.

I reached towards it, my palm outstretched.

And I was sucked in.


	2. Chapter 2: Cake

I screamed a lot.

It was dark, and wind kept slapping me in the face.

This went on for what seemed like forever, and after a while I stopped screaming, and looked around.

It looked like I was falling through space.

Stars surrounded me, and I _swear_ I could see a red planet off in the distance.

In fact, I was being hurled towards it.

And as I got closer, I recognized it as Mars.

"I don't wanna end up on Mars!" I screamed out to the planet.

The force pulling me along seemed to understand what I was saying, and turned at the last second, pulling me around Mars instead of into it.

And that's when I saw Earth.

It looked a little more… _animated_… than usual.

The force pulled me along, eager that the destination was near.

I winced as we got closer to the atmosphere, but I felt no pain.

The only thing I could feel was the wind.

I plummeted through clouds and the blue sky, towards a small island.

Well, it looked small from here.

But as I got closer, I realized that it was much bigger than I'd thought.

I screamed again, thinking I'd hit the ground, but much to my surprise, I merely floated down amongst a crowd of people, and landed gracefully on my feet.

I looked around, kind of curious about where I was, no that I was on solid ground.

I was in a courtyard, and it looked like I was on a school campus.

A girl bumped into me. "Gomen ne!" She said over her shoulder.

_Japanese? I'm in Japan!_

_Holy crap!_

I noticed then that everyone else was in uniforms: boys in a suit-outfit-thing, and girls in a dress.

And I was getting stares for not going along with the dress code.

I ran out of there, just letting my feet go, and not really caring where I was going.

I just needed to get away from all that classy, high-society reminder.

I stopped at a room.

'Third Music room.' Huh.

I put my ear up against the door, and listened.

_Sounds quiet enough._

I cracked the door open, and peered inside.

Then someone grabbed my hand and pulled my inside.

I looked down, and there was a small boy pulling me along.

"Tama-chan! Look what I found!"

"Nice work, Honey-kun!" A guy with blonde hair looked excited.

And hot.

I pulled my hand back.

The boy looked like he was about to cry. "Don't you...like me...?"

Immediately, I felt guilty.

_Damn_.

I extended my hand to him, blushing.

"Yay! New friend! Do you like cake?" He was happy again, and pulled me to a table where several other girls and a guy sat.

"I...don't know. I've never had it." I admitted.

It was silent in the room.

"Haruhi!" The blonde guy belted, startling me. "We have another commoner!"


End file.
